well this is what happened my bf, bj and i had exams and he claims thats what was keeping busy even though i saw he was online talking to other people then when he finally did call he says his friend died, u know that kid that drowned in new syrmerna well that was his friend so i forgave him and he sayed he is going up to virginia to visit his family so i thought i wouldn't see him until next weekend and i was okay with that but then he sends me a message saying "YO MA IMMA TALK 2 U TOMARROW CUZ THIERS ALOT OF STUFF GOIN ON AND I MAY NEED A BREAK FOR A COUPLE OF DAYS BUT NOTHIN LONG TERM " i know he says not long term but all the people i just let go and didnt talk to them they left me then i checked on his myspace page and he put up a background and made it look all nice but then it says he's single and in the "who would you like to meet" box it use to say no one i have a firlfriend now it has qualifications for another girl that he wants i guess i wasn't enough.
but i didn't think it would last long not because we didn't match up well its just everyone who comes into my life leaves me no matter the reason they still leave. and right now fell like i am worth am ones time and i would do anything to ease the pain just a little. and no i don't do drugs or smoke or drink i am a clean, boring, quiet, fat, self-conscicious girl that knows nothing about herself. i use to be a cutter or more of a self-mutalater and that use to help temporarely until my mom found out and she put me in with that quak
i just want to go back before my parents divorce when i was truelly happy but right know i could never get there i wasn't ment to be happy and right now i fell i don't serve a purpose anywhere cause if i were to leave right now and never come back it would impact that much it might be better so my dad wont be i debt trying to pay child support cause my mom overcharges him but he doen't say anything cause its for me and he doesn't like confrintation but i see the pain in his eyes though he can't see mine cause i have trained my self to hide it and this is the only way i get it out or quietly crying myself to sleep but thats all for another day right now my mom(beast)is calling so i have to suck it up and but on my happy mask for everyone
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wow, i'm so sorry, i no wat u mean. i dont remember wat happened until 2 years after my parents divorce, uhh, i geuss you could say i woke up wen my mom got married. but this isnt about me, i'm really sorry their divorce has had such and effect on you, if you ever want 2 really talk about it, or about anything at all, just tell my, i give you me e-main so its not displayed 4 every1 2 see.-Taylor Tot
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